Actual Factual...Lesson Learned

Monday, June 11, 2012

Today...40 pounds gone! And inches and lethargy and fears galore...and and and...the list goes on.

One big lesson I've learned is to be actual factual with myself about what I'm doing. What have I actually eaten today? How much exercise did I actually do? And as I look at the facts, I've learned to not put a value judgement on myself as a person based on whether I'm having victory or not. That one realization, that these facts aren't a value judgement, has freed me to take a hard fast look at my thinking patterns and behaviors in order to face them squarely-on to make needed changes ... without crumpling into a puddle of morose self degradation. I used to do that. Frequently. I was one big puddle.

My head conversations go something like this now:

"OK girl, you ate outside of your boundaries 3 days in a row and ate right out of the bag of Quaker Rice cakes. You know that is never a good idea to eat out of a bag of anything. You also didn't remember to do your ST on Wednesday and cut short yesterday's cardio. This may very well be the reason that the scale didn't budge this week. Or not. But you know this isn't how you want to conduct your life, Judi. It doesn't change the value of who you are as a person, but this behavior does carry a consequence that you must live with. Accept the consequences for this week and move on. Modify and don't repeat today."

I've learned that my choices of thinking which lead to choices in my behavior aren't a value judgement of my worth. I am worth a hefty price to God. Do I have to live with the consequences of my choices? Yes! But do these bad choices make me a worthless subhuman zero??? No, No, and No. Do I want to live with these behaviors? No! Can I change my thinking and my behavior...Yes! Am I going to? By God's grace...Yes!

Coming to grips with this has helped me to detach my emotions from the progress or lack thereof during the journey. It has helped me to look at my thinking/behaviors to pin-point error and speak truth to myself objectively with emotional freedom.

So today...I am actually factually joyously 40 pounds lighter. And grateful.

Romans 11:36

Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post

    Congrats on 40 lbs!!!
    3222 days ago
  • no profile photo CD12120990
    Thank you for this blog. It is right on. I need to adopt that actual factual language with myself.
    Congratulations on the 40 lb loss.

    Thank you for adding me as a spark friend. I look forward to going forward with the team Losing Weight for Christ
    3226 days ago
    Congratulations! Well done indeed. Proud of your effort and your changes. Such excellent work.
    3230 days ago
    Judi~ I love this blog. This is a HUGE concept and an important distinction. Congratulations on the 40 pounds and also on the ability to be "actual factual". I will remember that phrase!
    This was vital when I got sober. If I could take an honest inventory, take responsibility for all my actions, commit to change, employ action, and then pray and meditate I was on my way to a life of joy and freedom.
    You are awesome. Thank you for putting these axioms in such eloquent and personal terms!
    3230 days ago
    Way to go, Judi! I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who not only talks to herself, but also answers! Hehehe!
    3232 days ago
  • no profile photo CD7402665
    emoticon emoticon God is so good! 40 lbs lighter...congrats!!!!!
    3232 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

More Blogs by JUDIGIRL52